Zoe Zombie

I think that it’s so funny how people become completely incapable of operating a car the moment it starts sprinkling with rain.

In the morning, some guy decided he had it with people overtaking him so he drove in the middle of two lanes. I’m not exactly sure how it is he acquired a licence or a car.

In the late morning, a woman turned right onto Hay Street, Subiaco – a one way street. She got up a fair way until the lights went green further up the road and she was met with the oncoming traffic. Thankfully no one was hurt. She was in the left lane, so at least something was right.

And I’m pretty sure it took me 10 minutes longer to get home because everyone else was shitting themselves and slamming on the brakes for NO GODDAMN REASON. Come on, dudes. Even P Plate drivers are better than most of you. Yeah. That’s right. Those hooligans know something.

I once read that more people die in house fires because they panic out of fear. Their fear causes them to die of stupidity. It does happen. It’s real. I am afraid when I drive in the rain as I’m putting my life in the hands of people around me who panic out of fear.

At the risk of sounding completely female, I enjoy fashion. In fact, I enjoy it so much that once I wore a dress that had a split up the back so high that it almost went up to my.. erm.. fudge factory (how’s that for tact). The dress was gorgeous, but to save my dignity from being damaged I have decided to retire it into the closet forever. Also, I’m just not that handy with a sewing machine so I don’t think I could really fix the problem.

There is a great different between fashion and style. Style doesn’t necessarily mean that you are classy all the time – it could mean the way in which you dress. Fashion is something that I take design inspiration from. To be able to think outside the box in what we can wear is fascinating.

But there is something that just annoys me so much about Lady Gaga’s fashion AND style that I just put into words. I’ll try. First of all, she looks ridiculous. I get her style has always been out there as this persona of Lady Gaga. But she looks like Hannbal Lecter’s gal pal in this insane head piece. I mean, you couldn’t even call that high fashion or “European”. Sure, Lecter was European. But this… just baffles me. Is it all part of the persona – to be photographed in a ridiculous outfit so half of us will say she looks ridiculous and the other half will defend her?

I also enjoy not showing everyone my underwear. I’m just saying.

my lazy saturday morning became a little bit insane.

an elderly woman knocked on the door and started filling me in on some sort of gathering that involved bible bashers.

i politely told her that i was not interested. she ignored me and began flipping through the brochure, saying that it was amazing that jesus died for our sins.

i repeated myself and was even more polite than before – “i am not interested”. her attitude quickly changed and she became quite abrupt and rude – “ok well fine then”.

and i said to her “have a nice day” as she left my property in a huff.

i was interupted, cut off and then snapped at on my own property after i was extremely polite.

i have always been very polite – waited what they had to say and then told them i was not interested.

next time, i will not be so nice – they will get a closed door in the face.